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Child Psychology: A Contemporary Viewpoint, First Canadian Edition

E. Mavis Hetherington, University of Virginia
Ross D. Parke, University of California
Mark Schmuckler, University of Toronto at Scarborough

Morality, Altruism, and Aggression

Application Questions


1		"Part of Piaget's study of children's thinking involved their understanding of the rules in games. He focused on the rules in the game of marbles. Younger children were not able to follow the rules but believed they were quite sacred and imposed by adults. [However], these children were unconcerned about following the rules. Older children felt free to change the rules by mutual consent but then felt bound by them. The way children deal with the rules of a game can help adults understand how children deal with societal rules and expectations." (Constructive Guidance and Discipline, Fields & Boesser, 1998) Explain a situation from observation or memory of children playing a game. How do the rules vary by age?



2		Risk taking is an essential part of the learning process. Unless individuals are willing to consider other viewpoints, they can fall victim to rote learning and limit their innate curiosity. Behavioural risk-taking means extending, without danger, one's physical prowess. Intellectual risk-taking in science means generating and testing hypotheses. Artistic risk-taking means engaging one's creativity. What do you do to encourage risk taking in your own life? Specifically, describe moral risk-taking in your own life. Examine the tensions you struggled with that encouraged your moral development. How have you dealt with fear as you have learned when it is appropriate to take risks?



3		Coping well with stress invariably involves anger management. Anger, per se, is not the problem; rather, mindless attachment to the anger is. An oversimplified view of this complex phenomenon distinguishes between episodic/situational anger, which involves a particular situation, and chronic anger, which is more permanent and pervasive. Individuals with situational anger tend to identify more with their perceived loss than with their opportunities for gain. The tension between competing perspectives can be painful and oppressive. An "either/or" outcome personalizes the conflict: "If THIS happens, I will be happy, but if THAT happens I will not be happy. Since my enemy (nemesis) did THAT, then he/she/they must be responsible for my unhappiness." To break this compulsive cycle, try to move to a "both/and" outcome scenario and to become more responsible for your own thoughts, feelings and actions. In so doing, consider the following responses to coping with uncontrolled anger: Identify situations that trigger anger. Become aware of body warning signs. Discuss feelings with friends. Communicate directly and nonjudgmentally. Learn to assess needs and limits. Practice mediation. In contrast, individuals with chronic anger find most things unjust and are mad most of the time. Such responses are defensive and judgmental. Their perspective is self-absorbed; it is almost impossible for them to see another side of the story. Some warning signs to indicate chronic anger are: Labeling and blaming and therefore disclaiming personal responsibility in conflict. Mindreading or inventing motives in others for their perceived irresponsibility. Exaggerating or magnifying trivial incidents to boost self-importance. Holding inappropriate or unrealistic expectations of others or of a situation. So, what can an individual do to deal constructively with anger? Consider the following relaxation techniques. Try to practice these simple steps whenever anger closes down your awareness: How does my body feel? Calm down. Take three deep breaths. Count backwards slowly. Think calming thoughts. Practice positive self-talk. Think out loud how to solve the problem Later, think about the following questions. Why was I angry? What did I do? What worked? What didn't work? What would I do differently next time?



4		As a parent or teacher, helping children learn how to be accepted by others may be the most important thing you teach. Sometimes it takes more than modeling respect for other people's feelings. How do you respond to someone who does not seem to care or who shows no remorse for antisocial behaviours? Typically, such children have a history of peer rejection. They do not have friends, and they do not expect to have any. Therefore, they believe they have nothing left to lose by offending or hurting other children. Such a response stems from unmet needs for acceptance by peers. How would you help this unwanted child identify and meet his/her needs for acceptance by peers? How might you introduce the notion of forgiveness to both the perpetrator and the victims? Are there situations when forgiveness is inappropriate?



5		Of late, there have been a tragic number of shootings at high schools in Canada and the USA. Choose one such incident with which you are familiar. Analyze the reasons why youth behaved violently to others. How can we lower the likelihood of these horrific acts of violence among youth? 19

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