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The relationship of warm, responsive care to healthy brain development links feelings to learning and cognition. That link is one of the important findings of brain research. This chapter is about using communication skills to form relationships with children. To communicate effectively with children, the most important thing you can do is to listen—to both verbal and nonverbal cues—and to let them know you hear their message. Communication begins when you validate children's feelings (rather than deny or judge them) and help them put their problems into words so they can find their own solutions. By being respectful and communicating effectively, the adult can promote children's self-esteem, empower them, and support their psychological well-being in general. Some adults have a natural style of talking to children that can harm a child's growing sense of self and his or her perceptions of reality and feelings of security. To communicate clearly with children, avoid rhetorical questions or other questions that put children on the defensive or make them uncomfortable. Don't discount their feelings and perceptions, and don't avoid addressing awkward or uncomfortable situations; avoiding awkward situations can teach children to mistrust their own impressions. Don't send incongruent or mixed messages, which confuse children. |