Choose a newspaper from a medium to large city. Look through the entire paper and make a list of conflicts that are reported. With your small group discuss the following:

• Which were inevitable?
• Which might have been prevented?
• Which might still be resolved?
• What third party might be helpful in each instance?

1. Decide which of the above values and practices are your “top three.”
2. Decide which of the above values and practices present the greatest challenge for you.
3. What would you add? Together with your group or class, come up with your own core values and practices. Consider sending them to the authors for the next edition! We’d like to know what you think.
4. Think of someone who exemplifies many of the core values. Remembering that person, or observing him/her, what do you learn about the prevention of conflict? What one or two traits would you like to incorporate into your own life?

Select a conflict you have had over the recent past that did not go well. Then try to specify, as descriptively as possible:

1. What were the communication behaviors of the other person?
2. What were your communication behaviors?
a. Make sure you describe what actually happened, describing the event rather than your intent.
b. Here is a hint—if you use any negative, blaming words to describe yourself or the other person, you have not provided a clear, descriptive account. Avoid labeling.

Carla is a recently graduated communication major. She has been employed at a local bank with several branches to coach the sales staff in communication skills. Julie is a new teller whose communication skills had annoyed customers and co-workers. Julie told her supervisor that she would like to train the next teller, but one of the complaints about Julie is that she had not been tactful or constructive in training new personnel or communicating with customers when she was stressed. Carla, as the communication coach, began talking with Julie about how to better meet customer needs and how to train effectively.

One day Carla took a sick day; when she returned, the atmosphere was noticeably chilly with her supervisor, Bob (who was also Julie’s supervisor). Bob went to his supervisor, Brad, when Carla was at home sick, complaining that Carla was infringing on his territory by “supervising” Julie. When Carla was called in to talk with Brad, she became angry and called the manager of communication coaching, Sally, who worked at another branch. Sally called Brad and asked him not to interfere with Carla’s coaching activities.